League Headquarters · Founded 2013 · 10 Managers

Cujo's Fourteen Seasons

The fantasy platform keeps the rosters. This keeps everything else — who won, who never has, what we agreed to, and the twenty-one thousand messages we have sent each other since September 2017.

The Wall of Names The Punishment
21,477 messages since 2017-09-02 Commissioner Erick — "Dynastic" Draft order last place picks first Keepers declared before the draft Last-place punishment proposed since 2021, still not agreed

The Wall of Names

This league does not hand out a trophy you can put on a shelf. It hands out a GroupMe display name. Win, and you rename yourself. Lose badly enough, and you rename yourself for that too. Every name below was one somebody actually chose for themselves.

Worn in victory

  • Two Time Defending Champion
  • The once and future king
  • The champ is back
  • Sigma Champ
  • Dynastic
  • Coachoftheyear

Worn in defeat

  • Fourth runner-up
  • Fifth runner-up
  • Unlucky Complainer
  • Backseat Fantasy Driver
  • Former Fantasy Backseat Driver
  • Fantasy Follower (not proposer)

The Alabama basketball arc

  • Alabama basketball sucks
  • Alabama basketball is back
  • Alabama basketball sucks again
  • Alabama basketball rocks
  • Frustrated Bama B-ball Fan
  • Doesn't care about BB until FB is over

One man. One season. Four names.

Unclassifiable

  • Stay.in.your.lane.bro
  • Craig aka Noter dame
  • Rev Coachoftheyear
  • Golf Coach

The Ten

The 2026 field, from Yahoo league 147240. Ten confirmed teams, no open slots. The last column is how many messages that manager has sent the group since 2017.

2026 league members
2026 Team Manager Also known as Messages

Also in the room across the years: Justin Lay, Craig Hendon, Will Allen, Patrick Lay, Terry Rice.

The Belt

“One more day to start what will hopefully be my first championship and win the belt.”

Clayton · 6 September 2023

Confirmed sightings: Keith went to Disney to celebrate his (2024-01-03). Craig has a championship banner his kids came to look at (2025-12-31). Josh has won it, “but it’s been a while” (2026-07-14). Somebody who joined in 2015 was still chasing his first as of 2024-12-29.

And the standing proposal, from the commissioner, 1 August 2025: “I’m bringing a little plastic kids table and if you haven’t won a championship yet you have to eat at it.”

The Punishment That Never Was

On 6 September 2023 the commissioner wrote: “This is the 11th season. I think it’s time we figure out a bad yet reasonable punishment for whoever gets last place. However EVERYONE has to agree.” Everyone has never agreed. Five years of proposals:

    Still unresolved. It is, at this point, the tradition.

    The Record Book

    Deliberately empty. Fourteen seasons of results live on the fantasy platform and in people’s memories, and none of it has been imported yet. Nothing is invented here — a record book with made-up numbers is worse than no record book.

    Championships

    —

    Needs the season-by-season import

    Highest single week

    —

    Needs the season-by-season import

    Longest title drought

    —

    At least one manager since 2015

    All-time record

    —

    Needs the season-by-season import

    What it would take — narrowed down

    The league has been on Yahoo the whole time, which is the good case: the results exist. The obstacle is that Yahoo issues a new league ID every season. 2026 is 147240; that same number in 2025 belongs to a stranger’s league and answers “you are not in this league.”

    So the archive is reachable, but only by walking the chain of past-season IDs one year at a time. One prior-season URL is enough to start; the rest follows from it. Seasons 1–4 (2013–2016) also predate this GroupMe entirely, so for those years Yahoo is the only witness.

    Constitution

    Only the rules the chat actually confirms. Everything else is unwritten, which is exactly the problem a constitution page exists to fix.

    The draft is offline
    Yahoo is set to Offline Draft — the league drafts in a room, together, and enters the results afterward. Which is why the plastic kids table is a credible threat. Yahoo league settings, 147240
    Draft order
    Last place from last year picks first, then next-to-last, and so on. Clayton, 2022-08-22
    Keepers
    Keeper league tools enabled. Deadline Tue Sep 8, 12:00am PDT. Keepers are declared before the draft. Yahoo settings · Commissioner, 2025-08-05
    Scoring
    Head-to-head, half PPR (0.5 per reception), fractional and negative points on. Rushing is 7 yards per point rather than Yahoo's 10, and the league runs its own bonuses — 40+ yard plays, 4th-down stops, tackles for loss, and −5 for a pick six. Yahoo league settings, 147240
    Roster
    QB, WR, WR, RB, RB, TE, W/R/T, W/R/T, DEF, six bench, one IR. Yahoo league settings, 147240
    Trades
    Reviewed by league vote, one day to reject, no cap on the number, and no trading draft picks. Deadline November 28. Yahoo league settings, 147240
    Waivers
    Continual rolling list, one day, processed game time Tuesday. Yahoo league settings, 147240
    Playoffs
    Eight of ten teams make it. Weeks 15, 16 and 17, ending Monday, January 4. No reseeding. Ties broken by best regular season record against the opponent. Yahoo league settings, 147240
    Rule changes
    Put up for a vote. Adding teams is also a vote. Commissioner, 2024-07-23
    Last place
    A punishment requires unanimous agreement. None has ever been reached. Commissioner, 2023-09-06
    Commissioner
    Erick, and has been for at least the last four seasons. Clayton, 2022-08-29 · Yahoo: created the league